Going on vacation is supposed to be a relaxing experience – seeing new sites, having quality time with loved ones, and who can forget the food! Sadly, this group of friends learned the hard way that entitled, rude people exist everywhere. This is where our tale of insanity begins.
Lisa (names have been changed), a recent graduate from college in Germany, decided to take some time before jumping into her career to travel. Her older brother Ollie and his friend Bernie decided to join in for part of the trip in the United Kingdom. Long days of adventure require the right nourishment, and going to a buffet seemed like the perfect way to have a great time together and to gorge themselves on food, so the group decided to go to a super nice buffet in the area. Little did they know that their experience at the restaurant would be anything but a good time because of one entitled mother.
As the group enters, Ollie held the door open for his sister and his hobbling friend. Bernie had recently twisted his ankle pretty bad a few weeks prior, so he was in a small walking boot to keep his foot stable. He could walk ok with it, but Ollie wanted him to take it easy as much as possible, which would prove to be the first downfall in this tale. Also of note is Ollie’s outfit that day, which was a causal black t-shirt and a pair of black jean shorts. Staff at this buffet were all dressed in black slacks with a black polo embroidered with the company logo in green on the front and, in huge letters that no one can miss, “STAFF” on the back. To anyone with a working pair of eyes, it should be clear that despite Ollie being decked out in black, he in no other way resembled the staff at this fine establishment. Oh, how he would regret this outfit choice.
The buffet was like any other – pay in advance and serve yourself. Staff would be by to clear off dirty plates and restock items as needed. The group finds a table, and Ollie offered to grab Lisa and Bernie’s drinks. He headed over to the huge bar nearby with a large sign reading “ORDER HERE” to grab the glasses for the unlimited soda at the nearby self-serve fountain.
As Ollie was bringing the group’s Cokes back to the table, he heard an aggravated “Ummm…” ring out behind him. He ignored it, thinking it was somebody trying to catch a staff member’s attention. Surely no one would be wanting his attention.
After setting down the drinks, Ollie told Bernie that he’d grab his food for him, reassuring him he’d be sure to fill his plate with things he knew he would love. Meanwhile, Lisa was on the phone with their next Airbnb host hashing out last minute details, so she stayed back at the table to wrap up business before grabbing her food. Ollie loaded up a plate for himself and Bernie and brought them back, excited to dig into all the delectable goodies he had scooped up. Yet of course, nature called, so before sitting down Ollie excused himself to the little boy’s room.
On the way over Ollie heard it again. “Excuse me?” It was the same voice from earlier, a bit louder and angrier this time. Ollie brushed it off – he didn’t know this woman, she obviously wasn’t directing this unwanted attention towards him, and continued on to the bathroom.
A couple minutes later Ollie was heading back to his table, his trajectory putting him in clear eye line of a woman he would quickly come to hate. The woman was staring him down, practically shooting daggers from her eyes at him as she very loudly proclaimed, “EXCUSE ME… are you going to do your job or what?!“
Ollie was at a loss. “Sorry, WHAT?” he replied.
The woman was clearly livid. “No one has served us yet. You are going to get our food RIGHT NOW.”
It all hit Ollie then and there – the all-black entire, him helping his friend with his food and drinks – he now clearly understood why she was bugging him so much and simply replied, “Oh, I don’t work here. Sorry.” That should have been all, it was clear why she might have been confused, and Ollie had just cleared it up. Unfortunately, he was not dealing with someone who was logical in any sense of the word.
“YES YOU DO YOU JUST SERVED THEM, DON’T TRY TO MAKE ME LOOK STUPID. THEY CAME IN AND YOU IMMEDIATELY GOT THEM DRINKS AND FOOD. YOU ARE EVEN WEARING YOUR UNIFORM.”
This ticked Ollie off. Who did this woman think she was? The gloves were coming off and this woman needed to be put in her place. “Don’t raise your voice at me, lady. I don’t know if you have noticed or not, but this is a buffet. Go get your own food.” Thinking he got her to understand, Ollie sat down. But oh boy, was he ever so wrong.
At this point the woman started raising her voice and getting more and more aggressive. “ARE YOU SERIOUS?! Get your lazy butt up and go get me and my babies drinks. We want Coke. Go. Now.”
Ollie looked back at her, astounded. “I. DON’T. WORK. HERE. This is a Buffet. Go to the bar, get your glasses and don’t bother me again.”
By this point it was becoming dinner and a show for the other guests around. Really, how could you ignore this commotion! Among the witnesses was an actual staff member, who now swooped in to deescalate the situation.
“Excuse me, what’s the issue here?”
Before Ollie could say anything, the woman started screaming.
“THIS LAZY MOTHERHUGGER WON’T SERVE ME AND MY BABIES. WE ARE SOOOO THIRSTY AND MY BABIES ARE STARVING. YOU NEED TO FIRE HIM RIGHT NOW!“
The staff member looked like a deer in headlights at first. What in the world is this woman screaming about? He mumbled out a confused, “Ma’am… He doesn’t work here.”
“YES HE DOES! HE’S IN UNIFORM!” Again, a plain black shirt with black jean shorts, not really the uniform. The staff member was not having any of this lady’s bull.
“You don’t need to yell. He’s not in uniform. See, he’s wearing shorts; it’s against our company policy to wear shorts and-“
The entitled mother cut him off: “Great! Another reason to fire him.”
The staff member shook his head and tried to set her straight.
“Ma’am I can’t fire someone who’s not working here. Our shirts are clearly labelled STAFF… Either way this is a buffet and we don’t serve guests. The food is divided by countries right over there and drinks can be ordered at the bar or you can get unlimited soda for £3.99.”
“But he served that fat guy!!! I want to be served now. This is inexcusable!!!”
Wrong move lady.
Bernie had been watching this whole insane exchange unfold but now she had crossed the line. See, Bernie wasn’t fat in any way, shape or form, but even if he was, it wouldn’t matter! She had no right. “I don’t know what your problem is but you can clearly see that I can’t walk properly, and DON’T try to body shame me.”
Then the staff member chimed in, “Ma’am, if you insult another guest again I will have to ask you to leave. Like I said, he doesn’t work here and you need to get your own food.”
A bit defeated, the woman got up and stomped past Ollie, Lisa, and Bernie, leaving her 2 and 4 year old girls at the table alone.
While a bit relieved, Ollie felt for the young girls. This woman was clearly not a great role model, and on top of that, what kind of woman gives their 2 and 4 year olds Coke?!
The older one then looked over at the group and said “Mommy always yells at food people.” It broke Ollie’s heart.
He told her that it’s not her fault and she shouldn’t worry about it, but also stressed that they should know that is not how you treat people. The girls seemed so lovely, yet they were growing up with such an entitled parent and seemed to know it already. Sadly, the woman couldn’t admit her fault just quite yet, and would come back needing the last word.
Making a bit of a show of it, she came back with 3 plates way too full of food and the family began to eat. Ollie turned his focus back to his own plate of food, finally starting to unwind and hoping him, Bernie and Lisa could salvage the rest of this lunch they already paid for. Unfortunately, this woman was denser than he thought. After 20 minutes of shooting dirty glances their way, the woman began screaming again, at least this time to an actual staff member, of how they haven’t received their drinks yet.
The newest victim of this woman’s terror told her the same thing the first staff member told her: “Drinks are ordered at the bar. You can also get a glass for unlimited soft drinks over there, the machine is around the side there.”
She started yelling at the poor guy, “THIS PLACE IS RUBBISH! SOMEONE COULD HAVE TOLD US THERE WAS A BAR. MY BABIES ARE THIRSTY.”
Tired of this charade, the bartender now jumps in and yelled back across the restaurant, “I’M RIGHT HERE YOU HAVE BEEN STARING AT ME FOR ABOUT 30 MINUTES, I CANT BE MISSED I HAVE A GLOWING ORDER HERE SIGN OVER MY HEAD. YOU PASSED ME 3 TIMES AND YOU HAVE GIVEN YOUR KIDS WATER BOTTLES WHICH IS AGAINST THE RULES HERE. NO FOOD OR DRINKS FROM OUTSIDE!”
No one within a 1-mile radius could ignore this hilarious justice, and the entire restaurant erupted in laughter and applause. The woman flushed bright red – she was out of moves – and quickly stood and hurried her poor children towards the exit, leaving SIX full plates of food behind. At this buffet you have to pay £1.50 per 100 grams of food you leave on your plate. They instituted this rule to cut down on waste and it was extremely effective because people didn’t want to have to spend the extra money. One of the staff members quickly ran up to the table and took the food to the scale while another staff member told her to wait a minute.
She had 3700 grams of food on her plates (about 8 pounds), leaving her to pay £55,50 (about $68 USD). Upon hearing this news, she nearly exploded, and attempted to unleash her wrath once again to get her way. Would she ever learn this strategy would continue to come back to haunt her?
“WHAT THE EFF IS THIS?! WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?! I ALREADY PAYED £40 TO GET IN HERE!!!”
The staff member held his composer well as he informed her of the policy. “Ma’am there is too much food wasted in restaurants, especially buffets, so we try to prevent that with this rule.”
The woman wasn’t having it. “YOU NEED TO TELL ME THAT BEFORE I GET HERE.”
The staff member held back the urge to roll his eyes HARD as he said, “Ma’am you are standing right in front of one of the 16 signs in this restaurant that tell you about this rule. It’s not our fault if you didn’t see one of those signs.”
The foolish woman held her ground. “Well I’m not going to pay that much money. I refuse to.”
“Ma’am, you can either pay or we will call the police. You have been making trouble here all afternoon.”
The audacity. The woman screamed back, “HOW DARE YOU SPEAK TO ME THAT WAY! WHERE IS YOUR MANAGER?“
With a slight smile on his face, the staff member pointed back into the dining area and said,”He’s cleaning up your food right there.“
FINALLY, the woman realized she was completely out of options, and begrudgingly pulled out her card to pay the extra £55,50. As she was handed the receipts to sign, she tried to have the last laugh it appeared, as she angrily muttered that no one was getting a tip today. Acting sweet as pie, the staff member flashed his pearly whites and said, “Don’t worry, there a service charge added to bills over a certain amount to ensure that we get paid properly.“ That shut the woman up, and without another word said grabbed her kids’ hands and stormed out of the restaurant.
If only she knew this wasn’t the end for her.
With the nightmare finally behind them, Ollie, Bernie and Lisa could finally relax and enjoy the rest of their lunch. Once they ate to their heart’s content (while being mindful not to load up on more than they could consume), they gathered their things and headed towards the exit. Suddenly the manager appeared, excitedly waving them over to the cashier. Confused, the group walked over to see what was up. With a giant grin on his face, the manager gleefully informs them – “your food is on that lady today,“ and had the cashier return them their money.
Ollie and his friends gratefully say their thank yous and fare wells, conceding that despite everything that had happened, this was clearly the best free lunch ever.